Pathology, healing, counseling and oncology hope.

Eleven days after surgery, I visited my surgeon, had the stitches out and got the pathology results. They weren’t great. 6/16 lymph nodes were still involved in cancer when they were tested. The surgeon delivered the news like it was the end. She depressed me and I cried. I wasn’t even sure what it all meant but she made me scared with her somber tone. All that horrible chemo to no avail? It didn’t make sense to me. I felt ripped off and angry. 

On the way home questions poured from me (poor Lynton):

·      Maybe 16 nodes were involved at the start and the chemo did work. (That’s not a question!)

·      What percentage of women with my type of cancer have similar results?

·      What about the immunotherapy I’ve heard about? I’m not giving up.

·      You took them out and cut off my breast, maybe you got all of it?

With a few recent hits, I felt like I needed to offload to a counselor so I booked a session with someone at the Cancer Council. She was great and understood my overload moments really well. I explained how I’ve learned to stay present and compartmentalize each hurdle but sometimes I get thrown an extra load and overflow. She made me feel like I was coping really well and admired my resolve. I’m going again to learn some more techniques.

Last week I had an ultrasound on my liver. The idea was to see if the little spot of concern in there could be seen with ultrasound and then at a later date, biopsied. I could clearly see the ‘spot’ when the radiographer found it. I have never been concerned about this little 12mm dot in my liver. My liver function is fine and the spot hasn’t changed throughout chemo.

Today I went armed with questions to my oncologist. Thankfully I saw Jacqui again. The last two times, I’ve seen her intern and he hasn’t had many answers for me. She was wonderful and pre-empted my questions. Apparently 6/16 is good for cancer of my type. It’s definitely NOT the end of the world. There are many options.

The big one was that the radiographer did not think my spot in the liver was cancer! Jacqui explained that he thought it was a hemangioma, a benign tumor made up of blood vessels. Another complication is that it is very close to my bowel. If they try to biopsy, they could perforate my bowel or cause too much bleeding in my liver.

So we monitor. If it is actually cancer, I’m guessing it will grow and eventually cause me some grief.

My next specialist appointment is next week with the radiotherapist to discuss the action plan for my radiotherapy. The week after, I’ll see Jacqui again and start on either two or three different medications (Letrozole, Goserelin and maybe Palbociclib or similar). Palbociclib is an immunotherapy trial drug ($5,000 month – I get it for free). If there is any metastasized cancer, it will be hit by this drug. As there are questions as to whether I have any metastasized cancer, I may not get to go on this medication. I apparently have to start it at the same time as the Letrozole.

I left the Lyall Mc with hope and a spring in my step today.

I’ve got this!

X

Kristina