Saturday 30 December 2017

Embrace the Space

I was extremely apprehensive about chemo #2. I knew what to expect and dreaded the outcome. My port was used for the process and I was so grateful for it. On the day, it seemed everyone in the room was having trouble with their veins. My chemo seemed to flow in faster and the whole process was easy.
I went in very hydrated. I have always struggled to get enough water into my day because I never feel thirsty and just forget to drink. I expected the ‘red wee’ like last time but it didn’t come. It’s weird because the red wee is so strange but you rationalize it because one of the chemos is red and they tell you it will happen. When it didn’t, I thought there was something wrong. I called oncology the next day to ask. Can you imagine? “Um, hi, it’s Kristina Vonow, I had AC chemo yesterday and I don’t have red wee.” It’s laughable. Apparently all was fine so I went with that verdict and will ask more questions of my oncologist when I see her next.
Within days my scalp became hot and inflamed. I sought advice from my GP and got a medicated cream for the sores that itched and oozed. 12 days after chemo, they are just starting to abate. I think my immune system becomes so low, it can’t even fight a little soreness of a hair follicle. My scalp hurts and itches like hell but the cream helps, a bit.
While I was grateful this chemo round was overall easier with fewer side effects, I have heard No. 3 and 4 can be grueling. I will see on Jan 9, but until then I’m savoring the little joys of life; early morning walks with Lynton, trimming leggy petunia flowers, light summer rose pruning, butterflies, Christmas, wonderful family and friends.

I have received the gift of ‘space’ in my life. I have space to think, give and receive love, smile, worry less, appreciate more, enjoy moments (and even micro-moments), laugh, and not get ahead of myself.

I am going to write a play based on one of my favorite books for young people. I have the time and I think I’m getting some creativity back. That’s the plan. I wonder if I can make it happen… J  

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